I mean, she would never do this sort of thing to me. She would never leave me for a week, a day, a minute.
I guess I'll just sit here, waiting, hoping that she'll sign on to MSN. Then we'll talk late into the night as we always do.
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(Of course, I know you're actually gone, but for the sake of entertainment for both parties, I choose to write from the perspective of the cray person first and leave the sane comments and thoughts until after the disclaimer)
So basically it's been what? 11:00 hours? Something like that? Already, even with your comforting texts and assurance that you'll be fine, I'm worrying. I'm worrying about something happening to her and me not being able to see her or help her.
*sigh*
I guess I'm just succumbing to paranoia. That damn. Vile. Thing.
I miss you. I miss you like I've never missed anyone before. This feeling of emptiness, misdirection, and separation fills my heart. It doesn't feel right when I can't even tell you I love you before I head off to bed. It feels wrong that I can't talk to you at all.
It feels wrong. But I know this is right.
I want to be with you, even when I know I can't. I want to hold you, even when I know it's impossible. I would even settle for a "goodnight love" from her, or to her, but I know that's also impossible.
It's 11:11.
I want to make a wish for something bold and touching like world peace or something along those lines. But nothing comes to mind. All I can think about is you. All I can think about is the times we've spend together. All the moments and firsts we've had. Just... You.
So all in all, I'm wishing for you. I'm wishing for you to have fun, be safe, and... well you know the last one, it's the same one I've wished for every night for the last three months.
Karly, darling, angel, my everything.
I love you, ... forever and for always.
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